am i?

so here i am again, writing a post which is more about myself, not about building, houses etc. this post will be my everydays' reading since what i'm trying to write is more on re-developing my self-confidence towards my architectural world. you may leave this page immediately if u find this self-bragging-post is annoying.



ok, just to remind readers, the upcoming words are just for me myself to read and read and reherse everyday to make sure my self-confidence increases. not intentionally to be proud of it.







hahahah already sounds annoying ha?







ok. the point here is, i want to see the truth about my subconscious mind. about a fact that saying how our brain acts accordingly to what we think either negative or positive. So, starting with this final project, i wanna see how's the result. i'll try to reherse these everyday and see the result:

on previous crit session, i was standing still next to my presentation boards when my favourite & motivated lecturer came to see & judge my works. as always, i really wanted to run away as i thought my work was a total rubbish and i was too shy to face all the critics on my work (which i guess more towards myself). but to my astonishment, she made some 'unbelievable' comments. These are what she had said, remember, this is not intentionally to be full of my self etc, this is just an experiment to my subconcious mind!


the lecturer; talking about my self-confidence:

"i don't know how to say about you, you are..erm.. i can't really say that you don't have self-confidence, instead you are confident. the way you bring yourself, the way you speak out and all show that you are a confident person. it's just you've been to lenient to yourself. you don't push youself harder. when it is difficult, you just let it be unfinished. "

the lecturer; giving an advice.

"why don't you try to push yourself harder for the next project? because i bet, if you do, you'll be very excellent. because not like others, you have all the criterion, you have the creativity, you have the talent. instead, for me, i think you are one of the excellent in your batch. i think you can be a good architect"

and last monday, she asked me regarding to the project that she assessed last month:

" so how's the result?"
" doesn't out yet"
" owhh see. i'm just asking because i think u did great for the last project"

don't puke here. me either feeling terrible posting this conversations but trust me, i think it's all crap haha.

so, i'll wait for the result. i'll reherse these everyday in my mind, ciao~